So many times I gave away what God gave me to people undeserving
Such a naive girl was I
Seeking validation from souls who didn't know who they truly were
I felt my worth was between my legs because that is what I was taught by my father separated by blood
Not understanding it was wrong, I longed for his touch because I thought he was the daddy who cared
Looking back on those moments I find fault with myself
Why am I so angry within, I've forgiven the men that sinned by using my body
The aftermath of those moments were the catalyst to my sin
A seed planted that has taken root
Sinning against my body long before I would've been
Today I wonder who I would be had this not happened
Would I be more successful, less depressed and anxiety free?
Would I have had less dependence on Thelma and Louise to pray and come through for me?
Ask me would I take it back, knowing what I know now
Today I find strength in my experience and besides changing the past isn't allowed
I walk a lonely road because I simply refuse to follow the crowd
Still chasing for peace from the Lord
Forgiving myself has been oh, so hard!
But as I look to the hills from whence cometh my help
I still have hope that my journey has not been in vain
I still believe that God has use for all this pain
I still believe in Your Son who died so I could be free
And I still believe that You have a place prepared just for me!