It feels like the walls are closing in
On all four sides, I only see my sin
Pulled in multiple directions from within
Tested in every area
I asked for this, and again like before, I backslide
No grip; I only slip as I take the plunge
Why does God seem so close yet so far
I can't even see due to the clay that is mire
Is my heart blocked perpetually?
Back and forth from flesh to stone
Habitually I keep choosing to walk in the door that is wrong.
Emotions swirl, enveloping me in darkness
Mouth closed, no praise escapes my lips
Prayer ceased, the stock of my faith took a dip
The words of the Pastor impassable, for my ears, are obscured
Do I really want out? Because I try to hide from my Savior
Disgusted by my manipulation
Sin of prepense considering I'll be forgiven
But what for? I know I'm not worthy
New grace and mercy daily, when all I do is fail thee
Lord, did You waste Your time on me?
I've continually forgotten Your divine help that sits on the hills.
Down in the valley low, my own fortresses seem to block Your light.
Then like the sun, Your Son rises, cascading the most beautiful glow upon me.
Reminding me that You are intentional in all that You do, wasting nothing.
You knew me before I did, Your presence surrounded me as a kid
So hard to understand your thoughts toward me
Numerous, outnumbering even the grains of sand
Learning who You are, Psalms 139 opened in hand
My way prepared, my past covered
You go beyond, intimacy greater than any lover
Unblock me Lord, make Your Spirit flow
As I write these words, my faith has no choice but to grow
To get past the turmoil, again make Your Spirit flow
Stir my belief, a step further than just to know
Lift my downward head, for You are the Lifter
Through Your finished work, You are Yahweh, the most magnificent Gift Giver
Unblocked and freely flowing, as Your vessel I won't stop pouring
Unblocked and freely flowing, as Your vessel I won't stop pouring